Crazy Coincidence

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There’s no reason to add anything to Lewis Black’s work here.

On occasion, during my fifteen minute drive to work, I tune in Glenn Beck. His show is without fail immensely amusing, even if I have to concede he’s a master propagandist and purveyor of snake oil. Some have mentioned that Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck might constitute a powerful renegade ticket in 2012. From God’s ear, eh? At least it would provide a powerful cognitive sort!

Although Beck offers crazy as his stock-in-trade, sometimes he really goes running off the edge. For example, from April 2010,

We all find ourselves at a certain place at a certain time and we may not know what the role is we’re suppose to play, we may, in the end, we may not even know how much we effected different things, but we each are here and experience everything for a reason, that’s why I asked you yesterday…do not accept coincidence in your life. Look for the answers in your life, look for your answers in your life through coincidence, because there’s no such thing as a coincidence.

God is giving a plan I think to me that is not really a plan. And I stopped myself because I didn’t want to utter those things out loud, because that’s not exactly right, and it’s not.

The problem is that I think the plan that the Lord would have us follow is hard for people to understand. But I’m telling you, here’s what I feel with everything in me, and, if you’ve listened to this program for a long time, you know who I am. Um, and you know many of things I’ve done and said that have put me in, ya know, harm’s way one way or another, they always start at the same place, they always start at my gut or my heart, and then I figure it out as we go along. All the stuff that I feel has been important on the show has been things that I felt and didn’t understand.

Because of my track record with you who have been here for a long time. Because of my track record with you, I beg of you to help me get this message out, and I beg of you to pray for clarity on my part. The plan that He would have me articulate, I think, to you is “Get behind me.” And I don’t mean me, I mean Him. “Get behind Me. Stand behind Me.” I truly believe I have done years now of reading the Founders, their diaries, their letters, the Pilgrims, their diaries, their letters. I’ve held their letters in my hands. The exchanges between the Founders, I’ve held their actual letters in my hand. I have seen it with my own eyes…and I will tell you that God was instrumental and then knew it! They knew they had very little to do with it. They just stood where they were supposed to stand and they said the things that they were supposed to say as He directed. Some of them lost their way, some of them got it wrong, they got back and forth…they were human. But that’s what He’s asking us to do…is to stand peacefully, quietly, with anger, quiet with anger, loudly with truth.

How odd is it that one can build a many hundred’s of million dollar fortune by saying stuff that might earn you a psychiatric work-up if you said it behind a curtain in an emergency room? What a great country.

As it happens, my main area of interest is “co-incidence,” (and, chance, randomness, serendipity, luck,) as features found in descriptions in everyday life. Should somebody tell me ‘there are no coincidences’ I would want to patiently listen to he or she present their account. I’ll keep an ear out for Mr. Neck’s exegis beyond his implying he is serving some cosmic historical role.

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